so i was self-checking out at the grocery store and this comely stranger and I had been flirting a bit, and after they had finished checking out they went
" I DON’T HAVE FLOWERS TO GIVE YOU BUT I WISH I DID BUT HERE HAVE THIS."
AND THEY JUST GAVE ME A HEAD OF BROCCOLLI.
Guess who’s got a daaaaate
Everytime i see this i think this person looks so pretty and should be drawn in a disney style.
Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”
Why does this not have any notes?
lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”
“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”
“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”
when you finally receive an ask during one of those ask games